Sunday, September 19, 1999

Bailed Out

Naturally, I was grateful that Eddie bailed me out, but talking to him was awkward to say the least. Last we spoke, he let me know that he thought I should return to NYC. Now that he helped me out, it was apparent that his opinion of what I should do should not be questioned. He started off the conversation with giving me the time of the return flight he wanted to book me on to NYC. It was for tomorrow.

It was difficult to change direction of our discussion. I responded with how there were so many loose ends to tie up and that all my belongings were on the other side of the island. This was not my best excuse, since I had so few possessions.

Eddie, who was focused on solutions, was leading the discussion. He seemed to be willing to wait to hear about my ordeal once I was back in NYC.  I was trying to slow the conversation down before I ended up back in Manhattan. I told him that there would be a delay with my passport and I couldn’t leave until that was taken care of.

He said that he would call the US Passport office in the morning and push that through on his side. He said I should go to the other side of the island first thing in the morning and pack up my belongings. He said to only take what I need and give the rest to other campers who might want our stove, etc. He said that he would arrange for a driver to and from the airport and I should be able to make tomorrow’s flight

I was starting to feel trapped. Though he was helping me, it was not what I wanted and it was completely on his terms.  The thought of returning to NYC made me depressed. I began to cry and said, I said,” but I haven’t done what I came here for”. Eddie’s voice softened. Sweetie, you have been there for 3 months and have met great people, lived in a tree, we lived off the land and you have done what most people never do.  “You’re right” I said wiping my tears. He said, “ I am proud of how long you have been there by yourself. You are a remarkable woman, but there are so many amazing things that you should be doing in NYC. It’s time to come home. I miss you so much, baby. It’s been over a month and a half”.

“Oh baby, I miss you, too. Now I feel so torn.” I replied and this set off Eddie. I guess he was being so kind to me and vulnerable that my response just pissed him off.  I have never heard him so angry. He yelled and said that I really don’t have a choice. He would not help me if I didn’t promise him right now that I would return as soon as I got my passport.

His rage and threats made me cry. He continued to vent about how he couldn’t believe that I would even consider not coming back and was calling me horrible names. It was as bad as it gets.  Then he kept repeating over and over, “I cannot believe you are doing this.” Finally he said, “I will call you in the morning. If you have not come to your senses by then, it is over between us, you can forget about getting any money from me.” and hung up.

 

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